3rd Rock from the Sun
s03e06 Moby Dick
Hey.
Where are all the marshmallow bits?
They just poured out that way.
Hey, you guys.
Look.
Dubcek gave me a tomato plant.
I'm gonna feed it, and in a couple of weeks, we'll have fresh, plump, juicy tomatoes.
Silly Sally.
You can go down to the corner and get fresh tomatoes from Mr.Lee, and you don't have to feed him Nothin'.
He hates it when you even try.
Well, now, that was uncalled for!
Peanut brittle?
You know, Dr.Solomon, sometimes when there are changes in your life, you use eating as a way of filling that void.
Changes?
Well, nothing has changed in my life.
Well, except for the fact that Mary and I are no longer romping lustfully in pastures of delight, our writhing bodies eternally entwined, glistening like the morning dew.
Bingo.
Aah!
Why are you so jumpy?
Oh! I'm smack dab in the middle of dying is deadly.
Number 14 in the Anson nembrook detective series.
Oh, it's a gripper.
I think August is cheating on me.
Why?
Did she take out a big insurance policy on you and then have her lover cut your brake lines? I don't know what to do.
Well, don't ask me.
I'm 3 days away from retirement.
I gotta know.
Ok!
You talked me into it.
I'll tail her for ya.
I could do that.
Oh, yeah, but she knows you.
She knows you, too.
Well, yeah, but not intimately.
Me, neither.
Really?
Well, then why do you care?
Ohh! Well, that looks pretty crappy.
So, um how's your diet going, Dr.
Solomon? Oh, it's not just a diet, Nina.
It's a complete lifestyle change.
Sally just signed me up for a step class.
I'm drinking 8 16-ounce glasses of water a day, and I can eat all the grapefruit I like.
I suppose you have to diet when you don't have the willpower to simply eat right.
Mmm.
You wouldn't believe how delicious this grapefruit is.
Mary: mmm.
Would either of you like a taste? No, thanks.
That's all right.
Can I taste yours? You know, Dick, if you're too weak to be in the same room with pizza , Nina and I can go in her office.
Oh, no, no, no.
That--that's not necessary.
I'll give you a whole grapefruit for just one pepperoni! Let's go.
No! Uhuh how about 2? 2 grapefruits! And my watch!
Dr.
Solomon! You look great! Thank you, Nina.
I feel great.
You dropped your calculator.
No.
That's where I keep it.
Here.
Let me get that for you.
Thank you.
[Rip.]
What was that? Mary: Dick? Excuse me.
Are you all right? All right? I couldn't be better.
Whatcha eatin' there, Dick? Ribs.
Fat-free ribs? Oh, shut up! My diet is dead.
Oh.
Diet, huh? Must be rough.
Lucky for me, I was blessed with a high metabolism.
Thanks for the ride, Don.
Hold it there, Harry.
I can only release you into the custody of a family member.
Well, I'm right here.
Not you.
Where's Sally? She's in the other room.
Is she alone? Well, she's with Jeremy.
Jeremy.
Well, it's like she's obsessed.
You got any more hot sauce? Can I have a rib? No! No!
Let's hear from our newest fat-loser.
Hello.
My name is Dick, and I'm a fat-loser.
Sit down! No.
I have a lot to say.
But I don't want to bore you all with why I'm here.
I want to tell you why Mary Albright is here.
Dick! You see, we were lovers once, but that's all over now.
And she pretends that she's Ok with it, but she's not.
And so she's been trying to replace me with other men.
Men like Oscar Meyer Ben & jerry and the Pillsbury doughboy! Dick, please.
hey, August.
And Kevin Douglas.
You must be in drama class, too.
So you're quite a little actress there, August.
So you two are just rehearsing away.
It's very convincing.
I'd--I'd pay to see something like this.
So, now, tell me, Kevin, so you're, uhyou're, uh you'rekissing your new girlfriend, aren't you? Can you give me a minute? Right.
August, how could you do this to me? Me do this to you? What kind of a boyfriend are you? You--you lust after our music teacher.
You flirt with that sleazy Lorna.
Ok, but in all fairness, they both totally blew me off.
Oh! My pants fit! I won the war! That's great, Dick.
You lost weight? Even better.
I bought bigger pants.
Good thinking, tiny.
Why are you eating like that? [Mumbling.]
I'm sorry to hear it.
Well, Dick, your salad's ready.
I hope you like it.
Salad? Little guys never knew what hit 'em.
Who wants salad? I want some real food! I cannot believe how insensitive you Ar-- shh! Listen! [Ice-cream truck music playing.]
Mr.
Frosty smooth! Mr.
Frosty smooth! He's right on time!